{"id":3479,"date":"2011-04-06T12:53:35","date_gmt":"2011-04-06T17:53:35","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/thegoldensombrero.com\/wordpress\/?p=3479"},"modified":"2011-04-06T12:53:35","modified_gmt":"2011-04-06T17:53:35","slug":"pandemonium-in-the-parking-lot-and-other-stories-what-i-learned-during-spring-training","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/thegoldensombrero.com\/wordpress\/archives\/3479","title":{"rendered":"Pandemonium in the Parking Lot and Other Stories: What I Learned During Spring Training"},"content":{"rendered":"

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Spring Training is a wonderful time of year.\u00a0 It portends warmer weather, hope for the future and of course, the beginning of a brand new baseball season.\u00a0 As someone whose spirits lift dramatically at the mere utterance of the words \u201cpitchers and catchers report\u201d each February, I truly believe that Spring Training conveys much more than simply \u201cpreseason baseball\u201d, as an ignorant colleague of mine spoke of it a few days ago.\u00a0 However, one very important aspect of Spring Training that is not often mentioned is its educational power.\u00a0 While players learn offensive strategies, signs and new practice drills, managers and executives take a look at their teams and try to learn as much as possible about each player\u2019s level of talent and where their skills would be best used to begin the upcoming season.<\/p>\n

The educational process does not stop there, however.\u00a0 To the contrary, even the average fan can pick up insights into the lives of those around the game, gain a better understanding of the motivations of Maricopa County\u2019s aging population, and garner plenty of other valuable information simply by staying around the game they love in the middle of March.\u00a0 In no particular order, here are some of the important life lessons my dad and I gleaned from our father-son trip to the Valley of the Sun.<\/p>\n

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Managers need Spring Training too. <\/strong>A manager plays a very limited role in a blowout.\u00a0 If his team is winning or losing by eight runs, there is very little a manager can do to influence the game\u2019s outcome, so often there will not be much dugout activity in games like these.\u00a0 Not true in spring training.\u00a0 If you\u2019ve ever had the desire to watch a defensive team, facing a runner on third and one out, play the infield in to cut off the run while down 15-1, then come on down to Phoenix next March.\u00a0 A sacrifice bunt with a five-run lead?\u00a0 Absolutely.\u00a0 Green-lighting a 40% base-stealer with the cleanup hitter at the plate?\u00a0 Go nuts.\u00a0 Managers, much like a small child sitting in front of his first computer, evidently need to press buttons and work the controls in their practice games to prepare for the season.<\/p>\n

So do beer vendors. <\/strong>During our first game in Surprise, I asked my dad if umpires needed Spring Training, or if it was mostly minor league umps who handled these games.\u00a0 We agreed that they were likely major leaguers, but could not confirm this until the next evening during a game in Peoria, home of the Seattle Mariners and San Diego Padres.\u00a0 A loquacious beer vendor was chatting up his customers when one asked where he\u2019d be spending the season.\u00a0 The vendor replied confidently that he would be peddling his ice-cold Coors Lights in beautiful Safeco Field once the season began.\u00a0 Ron the beer Man is pictured below as he clearly struggles to find the correct brew for a thirsty customer.\u00a0 After some discussion, Dad and I agreed that if beer vendors need spring training, it\u2019s pretty safe to assume umpires do too.<\/p>\n

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In Phoenix, the healthcare business is truly recession-proof. <\/strong>From the \u201cstrike out cancer\u201d campaigns to the ads offering discounted eye surgery, if you\u2019re in need of medical help, there\u2019s no place better than Phoenix, Arizona.\u00a0 If we weren\u2019t busy noticing the number of hospitals sponsoring each team, we were probably driving around the Phoenix area, commenting on the frequency with which we\u2019d pass a Walgreens or a CVS. \u00a0As it happens, lots of people in Phoenix are sick.\u00a0 They need doctors and drugs.\u00a0 And the competing hospitals, pharmacies and other healthcare institutions do not in any way hesitate to announce their area presence during Spring Training games.\u00a0 Some of the ads were placed in normal locations around the ballpark, but others, such as the one below, were a bit more conspicuously placed and deserved a picture to capture the moment.<\/p>\n

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Be careful where you grocery shop. <\/strong>It is hardly the case that all, or even most, non-English speakers are threatening.\u00a0 However, \u201cFood City\u201d, the grocery store next to our hotel with its run-down surroundings and all-Spanish window advertisements, seemed to be a poor choice for someone like myself, used to the comfort, selection and convenience of the upscale Harris Teeter and Trader Joe\u2019s chains.\u00a0 In a similar vein, its co-tenant, AccoMart, had difficulty securing my business, even with its promise of \u201cShoes and Clothings\u201d.\u00a0 After a brief examination of the surrounding area and a couple of dirty looks from some street toughs in the parking lot, Dad and I quickly decided we were too scared to go in. There are many words one could use to accurately describe my dad and me, but \u201cintrepid journalists\u201d would miss the mark, and as a result, loyal readers of the Sombrero will have to settle for two hastily-snapped exterior photos.<\/p>\n

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It is unwise to tangle with the natives over parking spaces. <\/strong>Saturday night, Dad and I decided that with no games on the schedule, we would drive into Peoria for a high-class dinner at PF Chang\u2019s.\u00a0 However, with all of the best restaurants in the county jammed into a three-block radius, finding a parking space was\u2026well, a bit of an adventure.\u00a0 Dropped off at the front of the restaurant to claim our reservation, I was spared the \u201cpsychotic parking lot behavior\u201d that was to follow.\u00a0 Dad was not so lucky, and he later described the harrowing experience as follows.<\/p>\n

\u201cIt’s like a video game out there with 150 cars trying to\u00a0get into 100\u00a0spaces. Unfortunately, the game is being played with\u00a0actual 3500 pound cars driven by actual people. Angry, hungry old people trying to get in there before the earlybird special expires. These\u00a0people\u00a0have a sixth sense allowing them to\u00a0see back-up lights before they even come on.\u00a0Trifle with them at your peril.\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n

<\/em><\/p>\n

Fortunately, the senior Abramson on the trip, through sheer cunning, precision and just a little bit of luck, was eventually able to stake out a spot just seconds from the front door of the restaurant.\u00a0 We shared a hearty laugh about the whole ordeal afterward over a delicious plate of Kung Pao Chicken.\u00a0 But make no mistake, folks\u2014when it comes to finding a space in Peoria\u2019s restaurant row on Saturday night, it\u2019s Lord of the Flies <\/em>on asphalt.<\/p>\n

It is true that our Spring Training trip was a ton of fun, and I\u2019m already looking forward to until our next baseball adventure.\u00a0 And while we ignored our e-mails and phone calls during the trip in order to shut out the business world entirely, it would be foolish to claim that our trip was not educational.\u00a0 Though the everyday-life applicability of the valuable lessons learned over our four days in the desert can be debated, there\u2019s no question that both Dad and I departed Sky Harbor International Airport with a greater understanding not only of baseball, but of the city of Phoenix and its surrounding areas as well.\u00a0 And with Opening Day just hours away, I can hardly wait to see what other new lessons this new season will bring.
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Spring Training is a wonderful time of year.\u00a0 It portends warmer weather, hope for the future and of course, the beginning of a brand new baseball season.\u00a0 As someone whose spirits lift dramatically at the mere utterance of the words \u201cpitchers and catchers report\u201d each February, I truly believe that Spring Training conveys much more […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":4,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[1300,18,6,11,14],"tags":[2066,210,574,1336],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/thegoldensombrero.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3479"}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/thegoldensombrero.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/thegoldensombrero.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/thegoldensombrero.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/4"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/thegoldensombrero.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=3479"}],"version-history":[{"count":2,"href":"http:\/\/thegoldensombrero.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3479\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":3493,"href":"http:\/\/thegoldensombrero.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3479\/revisions\/3493"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/thegoldensombrero.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=3479"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/thegoldensombrero.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=3479"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/thegoldensombrero.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=3479"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}