{"id":3168,"date":"2011-03-07T14:36:54","date_gmt":"2011-03-07T20:36:54","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/thegoldensombrero.com\/wordpress\/?p=3168"},"modified":"2011-03-07T14:41:30","modified_gmt":"2011-03-07T20:41:30","slug":"ridiculous-baseball-names-at-spring-training","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/thegoldensombrero.com\/wordpress\/archives\/3168","title":{"rendered":"Ridiculous Baseball Names of Spring Training"},"content":{"rendered":"

\"\"<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n

After a long and arduous offseason, the beginning of Cactus and Grapefruit League play has officially ushered in the 2011 season.\u00a0 For prospect junkies like myself, Spring Training is one of the more exciting portions of the MLB season; an opportunity to watch the future of the game alongside future members of the Hall of Fame.<\/span><\/p>\n

Sometimes, however, there are simply way too many players to follow.\u00a0 In any given Spring Training game you are bound to see a slew of players with completely unfamiliar names, and jersey numbers that edge triple-digits and more appropriate for an NFL lineman or receiver.<\/span><\/p>\n

But if you were to take a few minutes to scan each team\u2019s respective roster \u2013 that\u2019s right, numbers 1 through 99 \u2013 you\u2019d naturally assume that many of these players are bound for greatness.\u00a0 Or at least their names would lead you to believe so\u2026<\/span><\/p>\n


\n<\/span><\/p>\n

When I hear names like Buster Posey<\/a><\/strong>, Brooks Conrad<\/a><\/strong>, Skip Schumaker<\/a><\/strong> and Clete Thomas<\/a><\/strong>, my first thought is, \u201cThat lucky bastard was predisposed to a solid, big league career.\u201d\u00a0 Although I\u2019m fully aware that a great baseball name is in no way correlated with actual success, its power to distinguish a player is undeniable.<\/span><\/p>\n

Therefore, I feel compelled to highlight some of Spring Training\u2019s best names \u2013 believe me, there are some good ones \u2013 as well as some of the worst and most ridiculous.\u00a0 If I\u2019ve overlooked any gems, be sure to comment and I’ll add it to our list.<\/span><\/p>\n

Best:<\/span><\/span><\/strong><\/p>\n

Bubba Bell<\/a><\/strong> (Billy Wayne Bell), RF, Boston Red Sox<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

With a name like Bubba, you\u2019d better be a damn good ball player or have the ability to wrestle a fully-grown alligator into submission.<\/span><\/p>\n

Ryne Reynoso<\/a><\/strong>, P, Boston Red Sox<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

Personally, I still prefer Renee Russo.<\/span><\/p>\n

Tucker Barnhart<\/a><\/strong>, C, Cincinnati Reds<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

After completing boarding school, Barnhart spent several years yachting on the Mediterranean Sea, probably while wearing something with a monogram.<\/span><\/p>\n

Daniel Dorn<\/a><\/strong>, LF, Cincinnati Reds<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

Poor Daniel\u2026if only he played for the Tribe.\u00a0 Imagine the potential marketing ploy!<\/span><\/p>\n

(Robert) Cord Phelps<\/a><\/strong>, 2B, Cleveland Indians<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

You know you\u2019re a baseball player if you willingly go by Cord when your name is Robert.<\/span><\/p>\n

(Allan) Cutter Dykstra<\/a><\/strong>, 3B, Milwaukee Brewers<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

Considering that he\u2019s the seed of Lenny, I\u2019m pretty sure that the IRS will soon forcefully repossess the name Cutter.<\/span><\/p>\n

Tagg Bozied<\/a><\/strong> (Robert Tanois Taggert Bozied), 1B\/3B\/OF, Philadelphia Phillies<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

This guy is a broadcaster\u2019s dream, and at the same time, a potential nuisance for Phillies\u2019 fans.\u00a0 I can already hear the call of his first big league home run: \u201cTagg tagged it!\u201d Rough.<\/span><\/p>\n

Worst\/Ridiculous:<\/span><\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n

Charlie Furbush<\/a><\/strong>, P, Detroit Tigers<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

I\u2019ve got nothing here. Charlie unanimously wins the blue ribbon.<\/span><\/p>\n

Brad Hand<\/a><\/strong>, P, Florida Marlins<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

I think it\u2019s safe to assume that Brad has been tormented his entire life, which still doesn\u2019t compare to the endless ridicule that Furbush has endured.<\/span><\/p>\n

Michael Dubee<\/a><\/strong>, P, Pittsburgh Pirates<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

The son of the Brewers\u2019 pitching coach Rich Dubee, Mike apparently enters the game to Bob Marley\u2019s, \u201cOne Love,\u201d<\/a> and has a wardrobe that consists of strictly tie-dye.<\/span><\/p>\n

Tobi Stoner<\/a><\/strong>, P, New York Mets<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

The second that Tobi becomes a mainstay in the big leagues, his jersey will surely grace the front window of every New York headshop.<\/span><\/p>\n

Mark Hamburger<\/a><\/strong>, P, Texas Rangers<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

Mark\u2019s name gives a whole new meaning to the expression, \u201cMeat.\u201d<\/span>
\n<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

After a long and arduous offseason, the beginning of Cactus and Grapefruit League play has officially ushered in the 2011 season.\u00a0 For prospect junkies like myself, Spring Training is one of the more exciting portions of the MLB season; an opportunity to watch the future of the game alongside future members of the Hall of […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":9,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[1300,6,16,11,13,10,14],"tags":[558,1941,1005,1934,29,1940,1933,1805,1938,1937,1944,1942,1935,571,1939,1943,1936],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/thegoldensombrero.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3168"}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/thegoldensombrero.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/thegoldensombrero.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/thegoldensombrero.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/9"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/thegoldensombrero.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=3168"}],"version-history":[{"count":9,"href":"http:\/\/thegoldensombrero.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3168\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":3179,"href":"http:\/\/thegoldensombrero.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3168\/revisions\/3179"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/thegoldensombrero.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=3168"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/thegoldensombrero.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=3168"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/thegoldensombrero.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=3168"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}